Shoot the Puck

The Toronto Maple Leafs faced the Ottawa Senators on Day #15 and could not get the job done. They were outshot by the Sens 36 to 19 and let in two costly power play goals within a minute of each other in the second period. Ottawa went on to win the game by a score of 5-2.

The shots are just not coming for the Leafs. In 16 games this season they have only outshot their opponent twice. Toronto has registered 394 shots so far and their opponents have bombarded them with 515 shots for a difference of 121! Vokoun has seen more rubber than a truck owner's ass at a gas pump.

Letting the Lead Slip Away

Day #13 brought heartache to the diehard Toronto fans when the Maple Leafs fell to the New Jersey Devils and then to the Montreal Canadians by a score of 3-2 in both games. On each occassion the Leafs were ahead early and just let the lead slip away. Gary Roberts was back in the lineup, but Alexander Frolov was still out. Toronto also lost Martin Lapointe to injury in the game against the Devils, making him the 7th player injured in 7 days for the club. This injury problem has everyone skating on thin ice wondering if they will be the next to fall in; everyone except for Ryan Malone. He is playing with no fear and it showed during the game with the Habs. At 18:27 into the second period Clowe and Mitchell squared off and Malone paired up with Hulse. Clowe managed to squeak by with a draw due to the linesmen jumping in early, but Malone proceeded to beat Hulse like he was a dog that just ate his Xbox 360 controller. Toronto GM, Shaun Butler, appreciated the heart that Malone was showing but not the brains. The severe pummeling costed Malone the rest of the game and in return costed the whole team the game. Malone has 6 points and 49 PIMs in 13 GP; the organization is considering anger management classes but will hold off for the time being.

The Injury Bug

Since day #7 of this season a total of six (6) Maple Leafs have missed games due to injury or illness. First it was the two netminders, Vokoun and Boucher, who went down with minor labia tears on day #7. On Day #9, Roberts was having an arthritis flare up while Ranger only had your every day lower body injury. Finally, Frolov and Little had to leave the game early on day #11 because they could not play through the pain of the gonorrhea. Apparently they met a hot little fan after the last game and ran a train on her, but little did they know, she had already contracted the STD after sleeping with Detroit's GM, Derek Chaiken. :) At least, Frolov managed to score two goals before rushing off the ice to piss fire. Warning...if you do this girl you will get gonorrhea...but would you really care!?

Stepping Up

Injuries to Roberts and Ranger could have proven disastrous for the Maple Leafs on Day 9, but new aquisitions stepped up. Frolov netted the game winning goal against the Penguins along with 2 more and an assist for his first Hat Trick in a Maple Leafs uniform. Fisher also excelled that game scoring 4 points in 26 minutes played. But not everything is about scoring; Daniel Winnik played great defensively by helping to successfully kill 7 out of 7 penalties and staying at an even zero for plus/minus.

Ryan Malone is taking a few games getting used to the team and his new position at center. "It's difficult adjusting to playing for a new team, especially since I'm not playing on the wing. I was getting a little frustrated and I guess it showed when I decided to drop the gloves and make Burrows my bitch." says Malone.

Getting Younger by the Minute

The Toronto Maple Leafs took another step toward their future yesterday by saying "good bye" to a pair of 35 year olds and welcoming players all 28 years old or younger. John Madden and Jiri Dopita were sent to Vancouver for Ryan Malone and young prospects, Daniel Winnik and Patrik Thoresen.

Everyone from Toronto is excited to have Malone playing for their team and they are looking forward to seeing Thoresen and Winnik develope over time.

The moral of this story: if you play for the Toronto Maple Leafs and you have loose skin and old balls, you better plan to clean out your locker.

Debut Games

With the blockbuster deal just occurring last night, Alexander Frolov and Mike Fisher still managed to join up with the team and make their debut in today's games against the Panthers and the Blackhawks. Even though they were tired from the trip, Alexander Frolov was still able to net his first goal as a Toronto Maple Leaf. Maybe he would have had more if the GM didn't forget to attach the new profile to his email to the commissioner.

Frolov and Fisher were not the only players to make a debut, Carlo Colaiacovo decided he wanted to make his debut as a goaltender for the last 15 minutes of the game with the Blackhawks. Vokoun and Boucher both suffered torn labias in the game and Colaiacovo felt he was up to the task. After letting in 3 goals on 3 shots he realized that he had no clue what he was doing. I would like to take a moment right now to thank the Blackhawks for not shooting the puck more.

Turning Over a New Leaf

With the fast approaching retirement of the Toronto Maple Leafs captain and star player, Eric Lindros, the Leafs were looking to make a change. They did just that by striking a deal with the Detriot Red Wings sending Eric Lindros and rookie, Beniot Pouliot, to the Motor City for Alexander Frolov and Mike Fisher.
Frolov and Fisher will add some much needed depth and youth to the Toronto roster and their impact will be felt immediately. Yes, its difficult to lose a player like Lindros who consistently racks up over 100 points per season, but it would have devastated the team to lose him and gain nothing in return.
When asked how he felt about the trade, Lindros stated "I feel like this is a good deal for everyone. Alex and Mike are great players and they are going to a team where they will get the ice time they deserve, and who knows...maybe I'll have a good shot at hoisting Lord Stanley's Cup with a phenominal team like the Red Wings before I make my grand exit."

I, the Toronto GM, plan to make a few more transactions in order to surround Frolov and Fisher with some guys who will help the Maple Leafs be a competitor in the GLHL for years to come. Keep an eye out for offers.